A place to feel the power of connection through a Heartfull.
The middle
The unseen
The low risk
The hidden
The safe
I have lived in the middle. I have loved to fit the mold. I have loved to calm the waters. I have lived to keep the peace. I have hidden me, for what I thought you needed.
I see now
You wanted to see me
I want to be me
When I let go of what I think you want
When I embrace who I am
When I am me
We are we
A short word, one syllable and just 4 letters. Yet we live for it, die for it, long for it, celebrate in it, fight in the name of it, smile in the grace of it.
After a wild month of growing the family, getting COVID-19 throughout the house, changing the family dynamic again, growing the family to include 2 more fur babies, laughing, resting, welcoming fall, being virtual, exploring, and creating I felt tired through it all. As we began to come out of our healing rest I knew it was time to write again, my mind was swimming with ideas but focus was elusive. So true to momma bear form, I turned to my little one for the eyes of innocence and simplicity.
I asked the simple question, curious of the creation that can come from his wild mind.
“what do you think the world needs to hear?”
And so it is, love had found its way to open my eyes and grow our hearts again
As we sat and enjoyed the view of a perfect afternoon, I thought of love and our love of family and friends. It seemed enough to write about and still I find the need to expand my view on love and I hope you will with me.
Love with heartfull includes the world in its big and small. Love of the 1, 2, 5, 1 thousand, 1 million, of the whole. Love is when we find the truth of ourselves and share that with empathy to all and in all.
With my heartfull, I looked at my day, at my mindset, at my relations and I knew I needed to be more me – True to myself.
Too often I find myself needing love
I have excuses that I just need more time, maybe next year, I need a little break, there is just too much. Well all those things are true but when I really think about it, I see that I already have everything I need to love more and be more.
I have the time to give, I have the focus to share, I have the passion to drive and I have the dream to be heartfull.
When you find your passion it is like breathing, it is crucial, it is life and I want to live that way and hope you will as well.
What is it that is the “thing” for you?
My things are a list of things
For each of these I commit to action. By committing to myself and my passion to share my love with the whole and live Heartfull.
How will you love Heartfull?
We ask of their dreams
What do you want to be when
Ask now what they want
I could ask what he wants to be when he wants to for up. Instead I ask, what do you want to do to change the world. I ask how, what makes you happy, what do you want to share with the world.
The same goes for each of us. How do we want to live? What do we want to share with the world?
The middle
The unseen
The low risk
The hidden
The safe
I have lived in the middle. I have loved to fit the mold. I have loved to calm the waters. I have lived to keep the peace. I have hidden me, for what I thought you needed.
I see now
You wanted to see me
I want to be me
When I let go of what I think you want
When I embrace who I am
When I am me
We are we
The clock ticks, night darkness calms, sleepy eyes rest upon the fading night sky
Time everlasting, cool air surrounds, warming coffee promises float through the air
The cycle continues, stars shine bright, the morning comes to shine through the day
Until tonight, my dear night sky
I have not set a resolution in enough years that I cannot remember my last resolution. This year however, fueled by yoga and ayurvedic studies, I have worked to set an intention. For me, balance is the much needed gift I need to give to myself.
As I started to think about what balance really meant though, I felt the nagging hurt. That fear and hurt that focusing on balance was just going to leave me feeling couldn’t get it all done, and of course that I was failing everything rather than thriving and anything. That thought hit me hard as a simple self made up lie and set in motion a commitment to balance.
Balance is the joy of self internal and external connections, the happiness felt by overall peace.
With fair confidence in my own thoughts and words, I was further encouraged this morning by a TED talk recommended to me by the fabulous self propelling filters and coding of the TED app. If you are looking to really be joyous in your own self, I hope you will follow the link to the talk.
Embrace your raw, strange magic – Casey Gerald: https://www.ted.com/talks/casey_gerald_embrace_your_raw_strange_magic?rid=rs0B8PCM3rTN
After the morning drive inspiration and affirmation that balance is my perfect intention I set off to work for the first time after holiday. It was a great day between work and having a tea party with my favorite little girl while dinner cooked. Followed by some awesome snuggles with my little man (photo not included).
Then I let my balance shift. I decided to check my email after dinner and realized I missed a meeting that had been scheduled, and that I knew about, during kid pickup. It was one of those meetings that 30+ people were invited to attend, only a handful would participate and really my participation was not needed since I work with an amazing team. Yet, I found myself disappointed that I forgot about the meeting and then, the TED talk from the morning drive floated like the awakening smell of a strongly brewed coffee on a cold winter morning.
My best balance act of the day was gifted to me from the stars and my forgetful memory. My best act was choosing what was right for me, and in doing so my teammates are trusted and my family is loved.
I worked today along with my team and I happily played with my children who were reminded again that mama hopes for a world where our choice is always connection and love.
To the teams that support me every day at home and at work, to the star gazers who dream with me for a happy and healthy world – thank you for granting me this gift today.
All the gifts are under the tree;
But still, I have one from me.
In the twinkle of each light,
I give to you my song so bright.
Sing it loud throughout the year,
To everyone, share my cheer.
With each note bring magic and joy,
A smile from much more than a toy.
For love and compassion is my gift you,
May it bless you this year through.
To all my loves, may this find you well and heartfull.
To my little ones
I fill my heart with light and love. I let it flow through me to grow, taking as little as possible.
So that you may know what the power of positivity brings.
It can be hard work; to cultivate, to connect, to be grounded, and to nourish where you find light and love.
Never shy away from that hard work.
That hard work is the only true work the world needs. The rest that we do, we do to fill time, hide our pains, to stay disconnected.
When you feel pain, disconnect, longing, call back to me, to your heart.
Call back to fill yourself with light and love…be heartfull.
There is such beauty in a field in harvest, cool crisp air, changing colors of leaves, the quieting of the wildlife before winter. Something rings dear to me in these days of reflection before the winter days of rest. Today, I can feel the pressing cooler air and it is urging me to ready my gardens for winter and prepare the home for the cozy blankets of winter snow. Before we get too cold though, there is still time for fall planting (always time for just one more) and in these thoughts I find the urge to share with you one of my favorite places to be Heartfull in early fall.
Every leaf speaks bliss to me, fluttering from the autumn tree.
Emily Brontë
For those of us in Menominee/Marinette I hope you will soon know the place of which I write; but for those this blog reaches that live farther away, I hope you have “a tree lady” just like us.
Truth be told she has more than trees but both of my little ones knew how to say tree before any of the other plants so it is the tale of the tree lady that brings us Heartfull today.
I am blessed to share with you a place to visit that is full of plants and knowledge, carefully and artfully tended by “our tree lady”. You see, she welcomes the kids in just the way we live, Heartfull.
There are rows to be run, berries to be picked, puddles to splash and garden carts for grand adventure rides around the rose bushes and lilacs. Here we learn why our peach trees need more tending from leaf curl, our variegated maple needs trimming to stay variegated (who knew?), and why that tree over there won’t be ready for pickup and planting until the fall – because we just won’t have a tree leave the lot until it is perfectly ready.
Here Ms. Eileen, our tree lady, is more to us than a place to shop for perennials and trees. Ms. Eileen, with her garden lot tucked within the town, provides a haven to those Heartfull, those of us looking for the right plants in just the right spots, for just the right memories.
So, as the fall air arrives think about taking a drive over to visit your “tree lady”.
If you are local to us, I hope to see you at one of my favorite spots. Wherever you go, go Heartfull and ready to bring the family, a cup off coffee, tea or hot chocolate and shop around for a fall planting or dream up some plans for the spring.
My favorite fall tree spot:
Mr. McGregor’s Garden
There is calm in the mind but too often it is behind the noise we create.
I find myself with a few minutes of just me but in that can I find calm of mind or is it littered with stress, worry, thought, the panic of the unknown? More than likely the time of calm is too easily filled with chaos.
This little one can be full of the energy of a thousand horses but yet his mind and heart when tended are the happiest and calmest I know. He finds joy in the simple moment of his sister finding the camera, and if I have a heartfull I can also find calm in the interaction.
I wonder how we create stress over calm though, why chose the pain over the joy?
But yet, I know how easy it can be to stress. I often find myself in the moment of crisis, what decision should I make, what is best for the team, how can I serve then most? Worry and stress so easily flood my heart.
None of it is real though.
The reality is that the stress and worry is part of an imagined future, one not yet created. I then realize the worry and stress is for nothing, the worry and stress can wait.
One of my favorite poems as a mother ends with:
The cleaning and scrubbing will wait till tomorrow, for children grow up, as I’ve learned to my sorrow.
So quiet down, cobwebs. Dust go to sleep.
I’m rocking my baby and babies don’t keep.
Babies do not keep and nor does life. The stress and the worry we create are not our reality, but rather a distraction. To be blunt but true, if you are stressed but your life is not in danger,
you have created the stress and can simply say
“this is not real”. Calm the mind, see it clear.
For now, take a deep breath and clear your mind. I think the coming weeks we can work on what to do after the “this is not real” and the breath. There is no rush, there is only the right time, the right day, the right moment. We may not know the when, but let’s trust they how and the time.
Live Heartfull as you breath and think upon the ease of a calm mind, the peace of an open heart.
Be calm, be you
